Changes
by Jebediah Sprinklefield
Summary: Everyone has to die sometimes, right? John Sheppard isn't any different...or is he?Rated for language. Spoilers: Anything in season one or two is fair game.
1. Beginning and Ends

Colonel Sheppard, Teyla, Ronon and Dr McKay were making there way back from the planets version of a foreign embassy when everything went wrong.

They had arrived a few days before and were met at the gate by some passing villagers who gladly informed them of where to go to meet with the planet's dignitaries. After brief negotiation they had worked out some good trades that would be beneficial to both sides and everything had gone well.

About the only setback they could find about the planet was the city's distance from the gate, which McKay whined about constantly. It was a good day long walk from gate to city even by the quickest paths that had been made specifically for trade routes.

The planet leader had provided them with an escort to take them part of the way, he would accompany them until nightfall, but then he had other duties to attend to.

It was about four pm AST and the sun was beginning to drift down behind the mountains, the planets axis of rotation was similar to that of Atlantis so their watches were no more than thirty minutes out.

A war cry issued from the bushes around them and half a dozen men had appeared around them brandishing guns.

"Bandits!" the team's escort had exclaimed.

Teyla, Ronan and Sheppard had sprung into action taking out the enemy, and even McKay was fumbling with his sidearm trying to switch the safety off.

The John saw it. One of the shooters had a fairly good aim, and as a result a bullet was now slicing through the air towards the distracted scientist. It was already too late to yell a warning, and the Colonel was too far away to be able to push Rodney out of the way in time, so he did the only logical thing he could do. He stood in front of the bullet.

Colonel Sheppard cried out in pain as the ten millimeter bullet pushed it's way through his vest and skin, ramming it's way through the muscles between his ribs and finally lodging itself snugly in the small space between his heart and his left lung. He stumbled backwards in a daze but righted himself quickly enough and took out the last of the shooters.

At hearing John's strangled cry McKay had finally looked up and after realising what must have happened he froze, his eyes wide.

"Colonel Sheppard! Are you OK!" Teyla yelled, running over to him once the last bandit was gone.

"Just dandy. Don't worry, the bullet didn't actually get me, it just nicked me," he lied.

Their escort came out from his hiding place, "Do not worry, the bandits are gone now."

"How can you be sure?" McKay questioned.

"The bandits of these roads are territorial, we are safe now as long as we are in this group's territory," he nodded to the dead bandits, "and we are not going to reach the next territory tonight. We will proceed a little furthar on and at sunset I will help you to set up camp before heading on my way."

"Well, if you're sure we're safe then I'm just gonna nip over to those bushes for a minute for a bathroom break," John said cheerily, quickly breaking for the bushes.

Once he was safely out of sight he snatched his pack of and rummage through it for bandages. He found then in the first-aid kit near the top of the bag, whcih he was thankful for. It hadn't taken him long to realise how bad his wound was. He could already feel the blood starting to stream out and he didn't have to be Einstein to realise the wound was fatal. He was losing blood quickly, he would have to drink regularly to restore some fluids, but it was only a matter of time until he bled to death. He knew that and accepted it, after all, everyone had to go sometime, and he had already cheated death far too many times.

He pulled his shirt off quickly and as fast as possible began to bandage his chest. He made the bandages as tight as he could without stiffening his posture and put on as many layers as possible without it being seen through his shirt. After his quick first-aid he chucked his shirt on and closed his pack to return before anyone suspected anything.

"Well, shall we continue? I want to get as far as possible before dark," he said, again in that falsly cheery tone.

"I agree," Teyla stated, "if we are to cover more ground we should proceed immediatly."

The team walked in silence for the next two hours until, as promised, when the last ray of sunlight were fading the escort had helped them set up camp then bid them a hearty farewell.

John wasn't hungry, but he still ate the reccomended daily rations to keep his strength up, careful to also keep drinking to try and keep as much liquid in as possible.

"I'll take first watch," John anounced when he had finished his meal.

"Colonel, you were injured, you should rest," Teyla looked over him with a critical eye, "and you are bleeding."

John looked at his shirt in surprise. He pressed two fingers to his chest and pulled them away, covered in blood. He was indeed bleeing. He had bled through six layers of thick bandaging.

"I must have been sitting wrong to let it bleed, but don't worry I'm fine, and I'm taking first watch," he saw Teyla opening her mouth to argue so he continued, "but, if you really want you can take watch for five minutes while I have a bathroom break."

He didn't give her any more time to argue, he just snatched up his back and headed for the dark scrub. Once again waiting till he was out of site he pulled of his shirt and hurriedly replaced his old bandaging.

When he returned just over five minutes later he found Teyla waiting to argue her case, but once again stopped her in her tracks.

"Teyla, go get some sleep NOW! That's an order!" he growled.

He was getting desperately tired, but he knew when he went to sleep he wasn't going to wake up. Not that he mindeddying peacefulling in his sleep, but he needed to keep his team going until he knew they were going to be safe. He could die in his own time, for now it was the team that mattered.

While he waited he busied himself with whittling a figurine of a wolf, using his pocketknife on a small peice of wood he had found.

"This is going to be a long night..." he mumbled to himself.

It was almost 6 am AST, and judging by the darkness it was almost dawn.

John quickly slipped away to change his once again bloody bandages before waking the rest of his team.

"Rise and shine guys, time to get moving!" he chirped.

Ronon sat up fairly quickly, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

"What time is it?" the runner asked.

"It's about six am, and I'm just guessing here, but I think it's almost dawn, so time to get moving."

Teyla was alert in an instant, "you did not keep watch all night did you?" she asked in alarm.

"So what if I did?" Sheppard shrugged, "anyways, doesn't matter now, time to get moving."

The four of them had camp packed up in about five minutes and were soon continueing their march to the gate, even if McKay was VERY irritable about it.

Teyla had noticed Colonel Sheppard was walking increasingly slower as they pressed on, until around an hour and a half into the journey he collapsed. Luckily, she saw his knees giving out and rushed to his side to stop him from hitting the ground. Apparently Ronon had also ben keeping an eye on him because he was at Sheppard's other side just as quickly, and the two managed to right him easily.

"Are you sure you are OK?" Teyla said in concern.

"Yeah I'm fine, sorry about that. Guess I tripped on a rock or something..." John reasoned, hoping they would just leave him alone and continue. During his watch last night he had been thinking a lot.

'What do you do when you know you're going to die?' he had ended up asking himself. He didn't have to think about it for long.

'When you know you're going to die, you make sure everyone else lives. Simple.'

And he was going to hold himself to that answer.

"Maybe we should take a break?" Teyla persisted. Ronon nodded in agreement while Rodney had a silent rant about Sheppard being a 'stupid clumsy goon'.

"Seriously, I'm fine, can we just continue?" the Colonel begged. But Teyla wouldn't give in that easy. Her lips were pursed in thin lines and she was giving him a very remprimanding glare.

"Okay, how about we keep going and rest in an hour?" John conceded, and Teyla finally agreed.

One hour, and about a dozen 'accidents' involving a supposed rock and the Colonel's feet later, Teyla called a break.

John would have argued, but it was becoming increasingly hard to stay concious and breathing was begining to take a lot of effort, and not to mention his shirt was now becoming drenched in sweat and fresh blood. His bandages had bled through again. This was the end of the line fo him.

The four stepped off the track, Rodney puffing and panting almost as much as Colonel Sheppard. John found a tree and slumped against it, sliding down it into a sitting position.

"We can't stay too long though," John reminded them, "I want you guys to get back to Atlantis before lunch."

It was a casual statement, Teyla thought she heard more than that in his voice. A bit of pain, maybe? Or was it sadness?

"What do you mean by 'you guys'?" she asked.

"By 'you guys' I mean you, Ronon and McKay ofcourse, who else?"

"And you?" Ronon spoke up. Rodney was now listening intently, but his mouth was crammed full of power bar.

"I'll just stay here."

"What do you mean 'just stay here'?" Rodney said, wide-eyed, after swallowing his food.

"I mean I'm not going any furthar. I can't walk anymore."

"They can carry you," Rodney offered.

"No." Sheppard said sternly, "I'm not going to burden anyone, especially if more bandits come. Besides, I'm not gonna make it to the gate regardless. Hell, the only reason I came this far was to make sure as best I could that you would get to Atlantis."

"I should not have let you kep watch last night!" Teyla scolded.

"I had to. If I went to sleep I wouldn't have woken up, then you lot wouldn't have gotten moving for a while."

"Damn you Sheppard! Why do you always have to be so goddamn heroic!" McKay said angrily.

"Because I'm expendable, you're not!" John growled, "like it or not, as soon as I signed up for the Air Force I became expendable, an acceptable loss."

McKay was going to yell back, but Ronon hit his arm fairly hard to quiet him.

"Buy you haven't been bleeding all that much," Teyla reasoned, trying to convince herself that he was going to be alright as much as she was trying to convince him.

John weakly lifted his shirt to expose the crimson bandages, making Teyla stifle a gasp and Rodney to gasp outright.

"It wasn't a glancing shot like I said yesterday. I have a bullet stuck somewhere between my heart and lungs. Honestly, from my esperience of this sort of injury, I shouldn't have gotten nearly this far..."

He would have continued to argue his case, but breathing was really starting to drain him and the white hot pain in his chest was flaring up more. Conciousness began slipping from his reach as his vision started to grey and blur around the edges.

"Colonel Sheppard are you alright? Colonel Sheppard? John, answer me!" Teyla cried in alarm as his voice trailed off and she noticed thebluish tinge aroung the edge of his mouth.

"I'm sorry," John whispered hoarsly with the last of his strength, "I'm sorry I couldn't get you back to the gate and I'm sorry I slowed you down. Tell Elizabeth," he took a stiff gasp of air, "tell Elizabeth I'm sorry I didn't come home, and tell Carson I'm sorry I won't be around for him to pick on anymore." His vision swayed again and he knew this was it, end of he line, "Tell everyone I'm sorry, and tell everyone I'll miss them. You were all the best friends I could have, better than friends, you were family," he gave a wea grin and puched Ronon lightly in the shoulder, "even you."

"Stop talking like that, you're gonna be fine, we're gonna get you to the gate and you can tell people what you want to say in person-" Rodney rambled until John cut him off.

"Stop, Rodney. I just want you to make sure everyone gets my message. Take care of each other, okay?" John said hoarsly, the las part barely audible. With that his eyes drifted closed and he took one last, rattling breath.

Ronon slid a cool finger under his throat and after a minute commented sorrowfully, "no pulse."

Rodney and the others walked the restof the way back in a half daze, Teyla and Ronon supporting John's lifeless body between them.

They dialed the gate and sent through their IDC, not even botherng to radio through first. What they had to say just wasn't to be said over the radio.

They stepped through to Atlantis, still dazed. They deposited the cold, white body of Colonel Sheppard on the ground tenderly, not uttering a word.

Rodney scooted straight off to his lab without pausing, Teyla just managed to seat herself on the gateroom stairs before collapsing into a fit of tears, and even Ronon looked extremely disturbed by something, allowing himself to get jostled around by people walking in around him.

Something was very, VERY wrong.

Beckett sprinted into the gateroom, his eyes wide. He raced to the Colonel's side and did the first thing he always did. He checked for a pulse. But unlike all those other times when he performed this simple proceedure, this time he didn't find what he was looking for. He gulped, afraid to mutter the words out loud, as though saying them would make them more real.

"Oh god," Elizabeth muttered as she hurried down from her balcony, John was extremely white ad not a muscle was moving. He was too white. Too still.

As she got over to the gate Carson turned to face her. He put a heavy hand on her shoulder, his eyes full of sadness.

"I'm sorry Elizabeth." He gulped again. "Colonel Sheppard is dead."

TBC

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I'm sorry if that was a bit dark, but the plot bunnies were starting to become particularly vicious. And don't worry, there is an explanation. You'll just have to wait for the next chapter...which I'm not going to post unless I get at least...say, I dunno, how about 20 reviews? MWAUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I got an A+ for evil on my last report card...

P.S: I know I have made a lot of mistakes in this, but I honestly just couldn't be bothered fixing it so if anyone would like to beta I would be forever grateful.


	2. Higher Planes

A/N: This chapter hasn't been completed yet, so if you are willing to wait I should have the whole thing posted in a week, but I know that's a long time to wait. I know I said 20 reveiws, and I stick by that, but I am going away today and will be gone until Sunday night, which is incidentally the night before school restarts, so I'll have to post then. I figured (or hoped)that you might get to 20 reveiws while I'm away, so I'm posting now. I apologise, I haven't even re-read this much and can't even remember what I wrote, but I did as much as I could. And thankyou for all the reveiws so far! glomps I will be sure to mention them in the completed chapter. Unfortunately I leave for Rainbow Beach (South-east Queensland) in five minutes, so without furthar ado: here's half a chapter, ENJOY!

XXX

The last thing John saw before drifting into the dark oblivion was a slender arm reaching out to him and a cool, feminine voice telling him everything was going to be alright.

The next thing he knew he was surrounded by black, an eery light originated from somewhere, but his surroundings were still completely dark. He searched for the source of the light for a minute, before realising /he/ was the source. And he wasn't alone.

In front of him stood Chaya, in a white dress much like the one he had last seen her in. She was also a beacon of light shining out in the darkness.

"Hello John," she greeted, smiling sadly, "I was hoping this wouldn't happen so soon. I feel guilty that you are here so young, but I guess I couldn't change that."

"Where exactly is 'here'," questioned John.

"This is the gateway to a higher plane of existance, to put it simply."

"What? You mean..."

"You died John. I couldn't stand by and let it happen, so I'm here to help you ascend."

"Lead the way," John said, flashing one of his most charming smiles. Although he felt he would never get used to this irritating glowing thing, he supposed it was better than being dead.

XXX

Beckett walked over to Weir, whose eyes were red and puffy, clearly showing the fact she had been crying.

"I just completed the autopsy on Colonel Sheppard. I found a ten milimeter steel-cased bullet lodged between the heart and left lung. Upon entry the projectile nicked and cut some major blood vessels, it also managed to strike the Aorta. Even though it barely grazed the Aorta it did just enough damage to seal fate."

"The cause of death?" Dr Weir was almost afraid to ask.

"He bled to death. From my estimates he took about fourteen hours to bleed out completely, and from the breif chat I had with Ronon I'd say it's about right."

"Fourteen HOURS?" Weir asked, shocked, "wouldn't he have noticed at some point in time that /something/ was happening."

"Actually, lass, my educated guess is he knew right from the start, "Carson looked at his feet for a minute before asking the question. He didn't really know a gentle way to ask it, but he needed to.

"Elizabeth, what do you do when you know you're going to die?"

The negotiator joined Dr Beckett in his analysis of his shoes. After a few minutes Carson broke the silence.

"Lass, there is something interesting I found. I know it's not much, but it is an optimistic veiw."

"What is it?"

"Some of the damaged tissue had begun to heal, only fast-tracked healing. I think I have an explanation for that, and even though it's just a theory, it's the one I'd like to stick by," the medical doctor sighed, "you remember that planet John and the others went to with that 'beast' on it, a few months back?"

"Yes? Why?"

"The people there said it was not uncommon for someone who was one the path to ascention to develop a special traite?"

"You think...you think he could?"

"Well, I'd say it is a possibility, and it's what I'm sticking by."

"I remember reading a report from a few years back about how Daniel Jackson died from radiation, but managed to ascend to a higher plane of existance with the help of and ascended being by the name of Oma Desala. But apparently you can't ascend without help from someone. Who would help John?"

"Doctor Weir. We only really know three ascended beings, and only one of them lives in this galaxy."

"You're not talking about that ancient called Chaya are you?"

"I'm just saying, it's the possibility I'd like to stand by."

"Well, just so you know, you're not standing by that possibility alone. I'll have a talk to Rodney. Maybe if he hears this things could return to some semblance of normal around here."

XXX

In the days since the Colonel's death Atlantis' offworld expeditions had gone to the dogs, so to speak.

Majpr Lorne's team was now the flagship team for Atlantis, Lorne being the highest ranking full-time Atlantis resident. Rodney officially resigned from any and all offworld duties, prefering to stay on Atlantis to head the science team. Teyla made the descision to return to the mainland and resume her position as Athosian leader.

Ronon had opted out of joining Lorne's team. Apparently his trust wasn't won lightly, instead he opted to go on the occasional mission, but mostly stay on Atlantis and train the soldiers in fighting techniques.

Lt Col. John Sheppard really was the central peice that bound Atlantis' flagship team, as well as being a central peice to the heirarchy of Atlantis itself.

XXX

"Rodney?" Elizabeth asked softly as she walked into his lab to find him buisily working on some random instrument, she didn't want to startle him.

"Yes Doctor?" the scientist asked in reply, keeping his back turned.

"Doctor Beckett just finished Colonel Sheppard's autopsy. We thought there was something you should know about."

"Yes?" McKay said, finally turning to face the expedition. His eyes were red, whether from lack of sleep or from crying Elizabeth couldn't tell. Maybe it was both.

"What do you know about ascension, Rodney?" Weir questioned.

"I don't see the relevance, and I hate to dissapoint you, but not much. Why?"

"Do you think John was capable of ascension?"

Rodney really seemed to be considering the possibility, "you think-" he cut miself short," but wouldn't he show some signs of it? Like the people on...whatever that planet was?"

"We think he might have, Rodney. That's the whole reason we thought of this in the first place."

XXX

I'm sorry to have stopped halfway through a conversation, but I will fix that ASAP, meanwhile, I'm off to have a great time EXTREMELY sarcastic with my family.

P.S: Do you people honestly think I would leave Shep dead and gone? NO WAY! Then I would feel guilty when I go to the Brisbane convention in November and meet Joe Flanigan. I don't want to put the hottest guy on Earth out of a job!


	3. Chapter 3

I'm not sure whether I want to continue this story or not. I'm not really fussed over it, but if people are willing to read it then I am more than happy to continue. I don't know whether I am setting my goals to high, but it feels like nobody is reading this. Should I leave this and go back to my first story,post the other story I've been working on recentlyor give up with writing altogether?

Awaiting your reviews,

Rei Evans.


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